New Year's Resolution

I have many resolutions, many goals and aspirations for myself.  However, I often find that I get exited about the "new" thing that I am doing and will slowly let the project die as the excitement wanes. This is usually because I was too ambitious in the beginning.

Having embraced a more "live in each moment" attitude, not depending so much on the future perfect me, I have decided that I am not going to make a new year's resolution. Instead, I am going to make a today resolution. What am I going to do today that will making me healthier, holier and more loving to those around me? I am going to renew this question everyday.  I want kindness, generosity, and loving sacrifice to be my normal way of being.  However, thinking about it and writing about virtues, will not change my rough edges or transform all my selfishness. Transformation occurs almost invisibly through daily effort. 

My life plan is to do the Will of God and to become holy. However, the Will of God isn't always clear and holiness is difficult. While this is the point of my life, holiness is vague, overwhelming and prompts many questions. It needs to be broken down. I think three categories suffice.

1) Mental and bodily health
2) Prayer
3) Love of neighbor

The first, is health. My body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. It is necessary that I take care of it for Him. He needs a pure, clean place to dwell in not a filthy or unstable place.  If I am not healthy and if I don't take care of myself, I am wasting graces and can not adequately serve God and my neighbor. How can I love my neighbor as myself, if I don't love myself?

The second is prayer.  It is impossible to love God if I do not know Him. Prayer is the key to establishing a relationship with Him. Like all relationships, the relationship I have with God is not static, it is always developing or if I "ignore" Him the relationship is weakened.

The third is love of neighbor. If I claim to love God but have no love of neighbor, I am a hypocrite. These two loves go together.

With these three categories in mind, I am going to chose an activity daily that will increase at least one of them. The activities are going to be simple and manageable. Maybe one day, I'll forgo a soda and drink water instead. Maybe I will spend ten extra minutes in prayer. Maybe, I will take out the trash when it is not my turn. Regardless of what the activity is, I am going to make sure that I go out of my way today to improve. I have to be the best me today -- whatever that entails, because maybe today is all that I have.

The Amazing and Miraculous Image of Guadalupe

        My aunt sent me this video for the feast day of Our Lady of Guadalupe. However, I only just watched it recently.  Although it is Christmas Eve, and about two weeks late, it is never a wrong time to honor the Blessed Virgin-- who with her yes, also became our mother.

       In this beautiful seasons of miracles, I hope you enjoy this video.

More information: http://www.marian.org/shrine/story.php?NID=3439

Perfect Joy - According to St. Francis

Yesterday was Gaudette Sunday and I was looking for some profound meditation on joy. Instead, I found this wonderful story of Saint Francis.

From: http://feastofsaints.com/perfectjoy.htm

How St. Francis Taught Brother Leo That Perfect Joy Is Only in the Cross

to left: Giotto's Saint Francis

One winter day St. Francis was coming to St. Mary of the Angels from Perugia with Brother Leo, and the bitter cold made them suffer keenly. St. Francis called to Brother Leo, who was walking a bit ahead of him, and he said: "Brother Leo, even if the Friars Minor in every country give a great example of holiness and integrity and good edification, nevertheless write down and note carefully that perfect joy is not in that."

 And when he had walked on a bit, St. Francis called him again, saying: "Brother Leo, even if a Friar Minor gives sight to the blind, heals the paralyzed, drives out devils, gives hearing back to the deaf, makes the lame walk, and restores speech to the dumb, and what is still more, brings back to life a man who has been dead four days, write that perfect joy is not in that."

And going on a bit, St. Francis cried out again in a strong voice: "Brother Leo, if a Friar Minor knew all languages and all sciences and Scripture, if he also knew bow to prophesy and to reveal not only the future but also the secrets of the consciences and minds of others, write down and note carefully that perfect joy is not in that."

And as they walked on, after a while St. Francis called again forcefully: 'Brother Leo, Little Lamb of God, even if a Friar minor could speak with the voice of an angel, and knew the courses of the stars and the powers of herbs, and knew all about the treasures in the earth, and if be knew the qualities of birds and fishes, animals, humans, roots, trees, rocks, and waters, write down and note carefully that true joy is not in that."

And going on a bit farther, St. Francis called again strongly: "Brother Leo, even if a Friar Minor could preach so well that be should convert all infidels to the faith of Christ, write that perfect joy is not there."

Now when he had been talking this way for a distance of two miles, Brother Leo in great amazement asked him: "Father, I beg you in God's name to tell me where perfect joy is."

And St. Francis replied; "When we come to St. Mary of the Angels, soaked by the rain and frozen by the cold, all soiled with mud and suffering from hunger, and we ring at the gate of the Place and the brother porter comes and says angrily: 'Who are you?' And we say: 'We are two of your brothers.' And he contradicts us, saying: 'You are not telling the truth. Rather you are two rascals who go around deceiving people and stealing what they give to the poor. Go away]' And he does not open for us, but makes us stand outside in the snow and rain, cold and hungry, until night falls-then if we endure all those insults and cruel rebuffs patiently, without being troubled and without complaining, and if we reflect humbly and charitably that that porter really knows us and that God makes him speak against us, oh, Brother Leo, write that perfect joy is there!

'And if we continue to knock, and the porter comes out in anger, and drives us away with curses and hard blows like bothersome scoundrels, saying; 'Get away from here, you dirty thieves-go to the hospital! Who do you think you are? You certainly won't eat or sleep here'--and if we bear it patiently and take the insults with joy and love in our hearts, Oh, Brother Leo, write that that is perfect joy!

And if later, suffering intensely from hunger and the painful cold, with night falling, we still knock and call, and crying loudly beg them to open for us and let us come in for the love of God, and he grows still more angry and says: 'Those fellows are bold and shameless ruffians. I'll give them what they deserve.'  And he comes out with a knotty club, and grasping us by the cowl throws us onto the ground, rolling us in the mud and snow, and beats us with that club so much that he covers our bodies with wounds--if we endure all those evils and insults and blows with joy and patience, reflecting that we must accept and bear the sufferings of the Blessed Christ patiently for love of Him, oh, Brother Leo, write: that is perfect joy!

'And now hear the conclusion, Brother Leo. Above all the graces and gifts of the Holy Spirit which Christ gives to His friends is that of conquering oneself and willingly enduring sufferings, insults, humiliations, and hardships for the love of Christ. For we cannot glory in all those other marvelous gifts of God, as they are not ours but God's, as the Apostle says: 'What have you that you have not received?' But we can glory in the cross of tribulations and afflictions, because that is ours, and so the Apostle says: 'I will not glory save in the Cross of Our Lord Jesus Christ.'"

To whom be honor and glory forever and ever. Amen.

from The Little Flowers of St Francis, The "Fioretti"

Shoulder Wound of Christ

It is related in the annals of Clairvaux that St. Bernard asked Our Lord which was His greatest unrecorded suffering, and He answered: 

"I had on My Shoulder while I bore My Cross on the Way of Sorrows, a grevious Wound which was more painful than the others, and which is not recorded by men.  Honor this Wound with thy devotion, and I will grant thee whatsoever thou does ask through its virtue and merit.  And in regard to all those who shall venerate this wound, I will remit to them all their venial sins, and will no longer remember their mortal sins"

O Loving Jesus, meek Lamb of God, I miserable sinner, salute and worship the most Sacred Wound of Thy Shoulder on which Thou didst bear Thy heavy Cross, which so tore Thy flesh and laid bare Thy Bones as to inflict on Thee an anguish greater than any other wound of Thy Most Blessed Body. I adore Thee, O Jesus most sorrowful; I praise and glorify Thee, and give Thee thanks for this most sacred and painful Wound, beseeching Thee by that exceeding pain, and by the crushing burden of Thy heavy Cross to be merciful to me, a sinner, to forgive me all my mortal and venial sins, and to lead me on towards Heaven along the Way of Thy Cross. Amen. 

When Time Touches Eternity

As you may have noticed, my subtitle for this blog is: "A blog focusing on living a virtuous life, NOT TOMORROW, but in THIS moment."

Currently, I am all about living in the present moment. I didn't always used to be this way.  When I was a teenager and also when I was in college, I mostly thought about the future. "What do I want? What is in store for me? How can I get there?" After college when life became more challenging, I mostly thought about the past. "I wish I can live in it again... or did I make the right choices?" 

Now I see that resting in both ways of thinking are futile. How true are St. Faustina's words!

Only the present moment is precious to me,

As the future can never enter my soul at all.

It is no longer in my power,

To change, correct or add to the past; 

For neither sages nor prophets could do that,

 And so, what the past has embraced I must entrust to God.

O present moment, you belong to me, whole and entire.

I desire to use you the best I can.

- Divine Mercy in My Soul, Notebook I #2

 
As much as I wish I could go into the past and either change my actions or live in it still, I am wasting my moments in the NOW on it. Since the past can't be changed no matter how hard I think on it, I am wasting time and causing anxiety in myself.

It is good to be prepared for the future, but it is futile to place my hope in it.  It is good to have dreams and goals, but as most successful people say, the dream comes true through the work of today. I think similar advice is true for the goal of Union with God.  C.S. Lewis illustrates this beautifully in his Screwtape Letters. (This book is a satire about tempting humans away from God.) Here is an excerpt from a letter from one demon to another:

CHAPTER 15:

"My dear Wormwood, 

        ...The humans live in a time but our Enemy destines them to eternity.  He therefore, I believe, wants them to attend chiefly to two things, to eternity itself, and to the point of time which they call the Present. For the Present is the point at which time touches eternity. Of the Present moment, and of it only, humans have an experience which our Enemy has of reality as a whole; in it alone freedom and actuality are offered them. He would rather have them continually concerned either with eternity (which means being concerned with Him) or with the Present --either meditating on their eternal union with, or separation from, Himself, or else obeying the present voice of conscience, bearing the present cross, receiving the present grace, giving thanks for the present pleasure. 
      Our business is to get them away from the eternal, and from the Present. With this in view, we sometimes tempt a human (say a widow or a scholar) to live in the Past. But this is of limited value, for they have some real knowledge of the past and it has a determinate nature and, to that extent, resembles eternity. It is far better to make them live in the Future. Biological necessity makes all their passions point in that direction already, so the thought about the Future inflames hope and fear. Also, it is unknown to them, so it makes them think of unrealities. In a word, the Future is, of all things, the least like eternity. It is the most completely temporal part of time - for the Past is frozen and no longer flows, and the Present is lit up with eternal rays... Gratitude looks to the past and love to the present; fear, avarice, lust and ambition look ahead...
      To be sure, the Enemy wants men to think of the Future too - just as much as is necessary for now planning the acts of justice or charity which will probably be their duty tomorrow. The duty of planning the morrow's work is today's duty; though its material is borrowed from the future, the duty, like all duties, is in the Present...
      We want a whole race perpetually in the pursuit of the rainbow's end, never honest, nor kind, nor happy now, but always using as mere fuel wherewith to heap the altar of the future ever real gift which is offered to them in the Present...

Your affectionate uncle,
Screwtape" 

Also, remember that God's name is "I AM",  not "I was" or "I will be".