LUST vs. CHASTITY - Day 3

I am not at all surprised that men and women today are treated as sexual objects, as Disney princess, Jasmine, says, "prize(s) to be won".  Many individuals today are surprised when they are used or disrespected; but a simple reflection on their dress and attitude may reveal why.  Sometimes blatant, and sometimes very subtle, we live in a society where "love" and "sex" are used interchangeably.  Many people falsely assume, that if they are are viewed by others as "sexy" they have value; they are loved. If they are sexy, they will be rescued. This is one of the biggest lies out there.

Unfortunately, it is being perpetually propagated in the media from 'family' movies to x-rated movies, where the main guy and girl are stunningly gorgeous and usually dressed to accentuate the curves/muscles. These movies include scenes that supposedly are humorous, that bring attention to the body, to prove the characters are in love, and/or use the body to accomplish "the mission".  Though these works are often completely "fictional", the images and ideas that these characters and plots bring are harmful to the viewers' dignity.  The message mainly being: "it is okay to use your body or another's body to get what you want".

How narcissistic is that?

The old admonition, "see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil" rings true today. As a society, we have seen/heard/spoken so much evil that immodestly and lust are not viewed as "harmful". Yet, there are so many more divorces, unfaithfulness/betrayal, broken hearts, insecurity, and suicides, because people long for love, but don't know what it looks like or how to give it.

Lots of money is spent on vanity. How does our hair look: are they cut/styled "cute", the right color? Are there blemishes/wrinkles on our faces? Can we walk outside without the perfect face? Who is it that we are trying to impress? Is it one person? Is it everybody? How insecure are we? How much do we value how others judge us? What image are we trying to sell?

Sure, some people may seem more willing to accept, flatter and flirt with us if we fit a modern "sexy" profile.  However, will this attention go away when we turn 40, when we gain weight, or are surrounded by others who exceed our sexiness?

Probably.

When love/value is measured by sexual attraction and not by integrity, commitment and values; it is often short lived and the person actually seeking love is hurt.

This is because the person(s) that we try to attract are shallow.

Likewise, if if we base our relationships on outward projections instead of responsible action, we are the shallow ones. If we don't value others for their character, personality and goals in life, why are we with them and what does that say about us?

Everybody wants "to ride off in the sunset and grow old together".

However, this ideal is not served on a platter. It takes integrity of individuals that includes unconditional commitment  -- something that extends way beyond external beauty.

Is the person you are with have a wandering eye? Do they invest in your hobbies or just your body? What are you selling to your "lover"? Or are you secure with yourself and with how he/she sees you? If he/she knew all your flaws, would they stay or flee? Vice versa would you flee?

How much does lust play in your judgements?

"Nice" is a stupid word

According to dictionary.com, the word nice has origins of a detrimental nature:

Nice [nahys]

–adjective, nic·er, nic·est.

1. pleasing; agreeable; delightful: a nice visit.

2. amiably pleasant; kind: They are always nice to strangers.

3. characterized by, showing, or requiring great accuracy, precision, skill, tact, care, or delicacy: nice workmanship; a nice shot; a nice handling of a crisis.

Origin:

1250–1300; Middle English:  foolish, stupid < Old French:  silly, simple < Latin nescius  ignorant, incapable, equivalent to ne-  negative prefix + sci-  (stem of scīre  to know) + -us  adj. suffix

—Usage note

The semantic history of nice is quite varied, as the etymology and the obsolete senses attest, and any attempt to insist on only one of its present senses as correct will not be in keeping with the facts of actual usage. If any criticism is valid, it might be that the word is used too often and has become a cliché lacking the qualities of precision and intensity that are embodied in many of its synonyms.

As you can see, it originally meant foolish, stupid, silly, simple, ignorant, and incapable.  Furthermore, according to this online resource the word nice “has become a cliché lacking the qualities of precision and intensity that are embodied in many of its synonyms.” 

"I am sure," cried Catherine, "I did not mean to say anything wrong;but it is a nice book, and why should not call it so?" "Very true," said Henry, "and this is a very nice day, and we are taking a very nice walk; and you are two very nice young ladies. Oh!It is a very nice word indeed! It does for everything." [Jane Austen,"Northanger Abbey," 1803]

Even in this modern day and age, when individuals say things like "she's a nice person", "I am trying to be nice," etc., there is no meaningful concept behind their words.  In fact, this word always begs an explanation.  “She is a ‘what kind of' person?”  However, substituting other words make the same exact sentences mean something definite:

"She is a pleasant person."

"I am being merciful."

"My grandma is loving."

"He is forgiving."

"I am being generous."

Lastly, the use of such a vague word makes a weak sentence, argument and statement.  It is a indicator of either a poor vocabulary, or the a cover up for some sort of lack, disinterest, or an excuse coming.  It is a vague feel good word, not a virtue. 

Words such as: kind, honest, understanding, merciful, patient, forgiving, generous, thankful, and loving, are words that describe virtues.  These are action words and are very meaningful, giving the reader or listener an accurate picture of what is meant to be conveyed.

I vote that the word nice goes back its original meaning in common usage or it disappears entirely. 

Perfection... from St. Faustina's Diary

"When I had gone to the chapel for a moment, the Lord gave me to know that, among His chosen ones, there are some who are especially chosen, and whom He calls to a higher form of holiness, to an exceptional union with Him. These are seraphic souls, from whom God demands greater love than He does the others.  Although all live in the same convent,  yet He sometimes demands a particular soul a greater degree of love.  Such a soul understands this call, because God makes this known to it interiorly, but the soul may either follow this call or not. It depends on the soul itself whether it is faithful to these touches of the Holy Spirit, or whether it resists them. I have learned that there is a place in purgatory where souls will pay their debt to God for such transgressions; this kind of torment is the most difficult of all. The soul which is specially marked by God will be distinguished everywhere, whether in heaven or in purgatory or hell. In heaven, it will be distinguished from other souls by greater glory and radiance and deeper knowledge of God. In purgatory, by greater pain, because it knows God more profoundly and desires Him more vehemently. In hell, it will suffer more profoundly than other souls, because it knows more fully whom it has lost. This indelible mark of God's exclusive love, in the [soul], will not be obliterated." - Divine Mercy In My Soul, Notebook V #1556 

"Let the souls who are striving for perfection particularly adore My mercy, because the abundance of graces which I grant them flows from My mercy. I desire that these souls distinguish themselves by boundless trust in My mercy. I myself will attend to the sanctification of such souls. I will provide them with everything they will need to attain sanctity. The graces of My mercy are drawn by the means of one vessel only, and that is -- trust.  The more a soul trusts, the more it will receive. Souls that trust boundlessly are a great comfort to Me, because I pour all the treasures of My graces into them. I rejoice that they ask for much, because it is my desire to give much, very much. On the other hand, I am sad when souls ask for little, when they narrow their hearts." - Jesus to St. Faustina, Divine Mercy In My Soul, Notebook V #1578