Tripping

Just when I thought I was in a good spiritual place, I tripped.
 
I have been praying, going to Mass and adoration, reading a lot of St. Faustina, etc. and I felt confident that nothing could shake me. 

I thought I have already been through the worst -- the last year has been traumatic.

Today, in fact, a few minutes ago, I received an email about an order of books.  I did something really stupid and shipped them to the wrong place.  It'll be really ANNOYING to fix this issue since the books have already been shipped and from different sources. However, in comparison to all the other anxieties in my life, this is nothing.  If it was an earthquake it would about 1.0 Mag, barely felt or worth noting. 

However, I lost all my peace. Can't even the simplest thing go my way?  How did this mistake go unchecked?  Can I have peace in anything?  Does everything big and small have to be a nightmare? 

I was angry.  My attitude was: "Yes, God. I only want THIS much suffering. And You already gave it to me. I have had my share. ENOUGH." 

In these few moments, I realized that I was once again trying to conform God's Will to my will.  My will is that things go well in my life, maybe a hang up every here and there, but nothing constant and nothing to stretch me or to tip the scales. 

However, who am I to have this attitude towards God, who Wills my very existence?  I may not understand His plan for me, but I am nothing without Him.  He never promised me that I would have any earthly consolations.  I assumed I have "rights" to happiness, peace, love, etc.,. and I am angry when I don't get these.  Rather, to be a Christian it means to give up the "rights" to my own life. 

This shipment issue is still annoying, but I have wiped away the tears and now I say, "Thank you, Jesus, for another opportunity to carry my cross and unite myself to You in love."

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Beloved, think it not strange concerning the fiery trial among you, which comes upon you to prove you, as though a strange thing happened unto you: but insomuch as you are partakers of Christ's sufferings, rejoice; that at the revelation of his glory also you may rejoice with exceeding joy. - 1 Peter 4:12


Count it all joy, my brethren, when you fall into manifold temptations. - James 1:2


Fr. John Riccardo talks about when life doesn't make sense: A Tapestry of Chaos and Suffering

How Can We Even Begin To Justify Our Own Greatness?

      The majesty of nature alone should show us that there should be no reason for arrogance. Can we create such power or beauty? 

Checking Our Attitude

This reminds me to stop grumbling and put on a new set of glasses: not redrose colored, but blessing covered.

Three Degrees of Humility

     As conceived by St. Ignatius, humility is the proper disposition that a human will should assume in relation to the divine will. It may reach one of three levels of union with the will of God, in ascending order of sublimity.
    I. The first form of humility means that quality of submission to the Divine Majesty which makes the will ready to sacrifice any created good, even life itself, rather than disobey a commandment of God binding under mortal sin. In terms of indifference or interior freedom, it requires habitual detachment at least from those creatures which cannot be enjoyed without loss of sanctifying grace.
     II.The second level of humility is essentially higher. It presupposes the first but goes beyond it with a readiness to sacrifice anything rather than offend God by venial sin. To practice the second degree, I should be no more "inclined to have riches rather than poverty, to seek honor rather than dishonor, to desire a long life rather than a short life, provided in either alternative I should promote equally the service of God and the salvation of my soul." St. Ignatius' doctrine here is in full accord with the Church's spiritual teaching. Our fallen human nature requires many practices which are not binding under mortal sin. In fact, we must perform even some actions which are not strictly obligatory if we are to avoid sinning mortally.
     III. Assuming that a person has attained the first and second levels, there is still one higher degree, which is "the most perfect kind of humility."
     As explained by St. Ignatius in a little-known Directory written by himself, the basic difference between the second and third modes lies in the attitude of the will towards poverty and humiliations. If my will is ready to accept them, but equally ready to avoid them, then I am in the second degree. But if I am not only willing to accept, but actually prefer poverty and humiliations, then I am in the third level of humility.
     Concretely, this means that a person is willing to accept the evangelical counsels. Thus a person making the Spiritual Exercises is to be encouraged "to desire the counsels rather than (just) the precepts, if this be for the greater service of God" (Monumenta Historica, "Exercitia Spiritualia," pp. 779, 781).
 taken from Father John A. Hardon, S.J. Archives: http://www.therealpresence.org/archives/Saints/Saints_001.htm

No Longer Will I Be Afraid

Father John Riccardo at Kensington 5/28/11 from Kensington on Vimeo.

Humility: Accepting Love From Others

I had prepared a quote about humility today to reflect upon. However, the love that I was shown recently trumps it. A few days ago many people showed me their love and support.

Some days, I feel of little value or used by the people around me. For a brief period in my life, I was very depressed and death seemed to be a desirable state. I never hurt myself or anything, yet, my soul was dead. I felt as if I would never find joy again.

I was wrong. God is so good. He has blessed me in so many new ways. The people in my life make me want to live again - and not as the old me, either. They, by their simple acts of kindness, make me aspire to be better. The kindness of these people humble me.

I think humility is letting others take care of you.  It is accepting that you can't do everything on your own. It is accepting that you are not perfect, seeing yourself as you really are: fallen, but loved.  Humility is allowing others to be generous/self-donative towards you, while you accept gracefully.  

Humility is swallowing pride and submitting yourself to their gifts of love.

Spiritually adopt an unborn child

     "Jesus, Mary, Joseph, I love you very much. I beg of you to spare the life of the unborn child I have spiritually adopted, who is in danger of abortion." - Archbishop Fulton Sheen

    Say this prayer every day for 9 months to save a baby’s life! http://www.spiritualadoption.org/index.html

 
"A person's a person, no matter how small." -- Dr. Seuss

IN THE NEWS:

Great News! 361 Moms Choose to Keep Their Babies!

Over 440 babies saved by free ‘Bella’ moviel

My gorgeous miracle - Mother celebrates daughters birthday after miscarriage mishap

Young-mother-with-cancer-sacrifices-life-for-unborn-child

See Baby Development

Encouragement

I had a really bad week where it was a huge struggle to be motivated. I was hurting so much that all I could do was pray and focus on getting through each moment of each day without collapsing.

Today, I was given new strength to overcome the particular cross that is so heavy.  I felt that these verses spoke to what I am going through and encourages me to look past the hurt and suffering.

My child, if you are gong to serve the Lord, be prepared for times when you will be put to the test. 

Be sincere and determined. 

Keep calm when trouble comes. 

Stay with the Lord; never abandon him, and you will be prosperous at the end of your days. 

Accept what ever happens to you. 

Even if you suffer humiliation, be patient. 

Gold is tested by fire, and human character is tested in the furnace of humiliation. 

Trust the Lord, and he will help you. 

Walk straight in his ways, and put your hope in him. 

All you that fear the Lord, wait for him to show you his mercy. 

Do not turn away from him, or you will fall.  

All you that fear the Lord, trust him, and you will certainly be rewarded. 

All you that fear the Lord, look forward to his blessings of mercy and eternal happiness. 

Think back to the ancient generations and consider this: has the Lord ever disappointed anyone who put his hope in him? 

Has the Lord ever abandoned anyone who held him in constant reverence? 

Has the Lord ever ignored anyone who prayed to him? 

The Lord is kind and merciful; he forgives our sins and keeps us safe in the time of trouble. 

But those who lose their nerve are doomed- all those sinners who try to have it both ways! 

Doom is sure to come for those who lose their courage; they have no faith, and so they will have no protection. 

Doom is sure to come for those who lose their hope. 

What will they do when the Lord comes to judge them? 

Those who fear the Lord do not disobey his commands; those who love him will live as he wants them to live.  

Those who fear and love the Lord will try to please him and devote themselves to the Law.  

Those who fear the Lord are always ready to serve him. 

They humble themselves before him, and say,"We place our destiny in the hands of the Lord, not in human hands, because his mercy is as great as his majesty." 

-- Sirach 2:1-18 

Humilitas, Humus: The Earth Which Is Beneath Us

     "The word humility signifies lowliness or submissiveness and it is derived from the Latin humilitas or, as St. Thomas says, from humus, i.e. the earth which is beneath us. As applied to persons and things it means that which is abject, ignoble, or of poor condition, as we ordinarily say, not worth much. Thus we say that a man is of humble birth or that a house is a humble dwelling. As restricted to persons, humility is understood also in the sense of afflictions or miseries, which may be inflicted by external agents, as when a man humiliates another by causing him pain or suffering. It is in this sense that others may bring about humiliations and subject us to them.
     Humility in a higher and ethical sense is that by which a man has a modest estimate of his own worth, and submits himself to others. According to this meaning no man can humiliate another, but only himself, and this he can do properly only when aided by Divine grace. We are treating here of humility in this sense, that is, of the virtue of humility."
- http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/07543b.htm

Oh Present Moment

When I look into the future, I am frightened, 

But why plunge into the future?

Only the present moment is precious to me,

As the future can never enter my soul at all.

It is no longer in my power,

To change, correct or add to the past; 

For neither sages nor prophets could do that,

And so, what the past has embraced I must entrust to God.

O present moment, you belong to me, whole and entire.

I desire to use you the best I can.

And although I am weak and small,

You grant me the grace of Your Omnipotence.

And so trusting in Your mercy, 

I walk through life like a little child,

Offering You each day this heart

Burning with love for Your greater glory.

-St. Faustina, Divine Mercy in My Soul, Notebook I #2

The Violet & the Servant

"Be like the violet, which blossoms unseen. This modest little flower grows in the midst of the loftier plants which surround it, being itself unheeded and unknown, Charming indeed it is in its robe of purple; delightful is the fragrance it diffuses; yet it knows not that it is so sweet and fair. Do you resemble this flower? The more firmly this tendency to pride is implanted by nature in the heart of woman, the more edifying and meritorious it is when she, with the aid of divine grace, fights against the tendency and gradually eradicates it, planting in its stead the fragrant violet of humility, causing it to take root to flourish and blossom. The violet of humility is indeed one of the fairest ornaments of woman, and of the young girl more especially. "- Father Lasance, The Catholic Girl's Guide 

Now He told a parable to those who were invited, when He marked how they chose the places of honor, saying to them, "When you are invited by any one to a marriage feast, do not sit down in a place of honor, lest a more eminent guest than you be invited by him; and he who invited you both will come and say to you, 'Give place to this man,' and then you will begin with shame to take the lowest place. But when you are invited go and sit in the lowest place, so that when your host comes he may say 'go up higher'; then you will be honored in the presence of all who sit at table with you. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself shall be exalted."- Luke  14:7-11

“Humility is the foundation of all the other virtues hence, in the soul in which this virtue does not exist there cannot be any other virtue except in mere appearance.” - St. Augustine

I have been reflecting on humility for seven days now...

Observations thus far:  
1) it is not placing yourself above others; 
2) it has the characteristics of a violet: pleasant, small, and unheeded; 
3) it is the precursor for other virtues;  
4) it serves others. 

Reflection on myself for today: Have I exulted myself above those in all my interactions?  Were my actions, words or thoughts humble?  Did I have a pleasant demeanor?  Did I make a big deal out of insignificant things?  Who did I serve today?  Was I Christ to anybody?  Or did I expect to be served?

Yoga, a sinful practice?

When my whole body is tense and I feel anxious, it is helpful to exercise.  I go on walks, runs, and swims.  I take classes at my gym and sometimes I do yoga.  These all relax my mind and body.

I know that yoga is connected to Eastern religions as a form of meditation.  However, I argue to myself that it doesn't mean anything to me because I just view it as exercise.  It's just stretching.  Also, God knows my heart...so it is fine.

However, I couldn't have been more wrong. 

After some research, I found that yoga is turning the mind on itself and this is anti-Christian and New Age.  It is a union with false gods.  (See below.)

If yoga is New Age, and thus, Anti-Christian, why dabble in it? Why take risks or set bad examples for others?  By doing yoga, I signal: "I am okay with this.  I don't think there is anything wrong here." 

I may be only one person, but I have decided to not make New Age practices a part of my cultural norm despite my good intentions or "but this doesn't affect me" thinking. 

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According to the Bhagavad Gita, from which Iyengar quotes and calls “the most important authority on Yoga philosophy”, the whole purpose of yoga is to “escape pain and sorrow” (p. 19). There are eight “limbs” to yoga. Pranayama, the breath, is actually the fourth limb. The goal is to reach the eighth called Samadhi, which is when the yogi relinquishes the body for a state of transcendental perfection in union with the universe, or essentially an altered mental state. One of the beliefs behind the practice is that each person is granted a fixed number of breaths, and yoga will lengthen each breath for the purpose of extending the amount of time a soul can exist in the altered state before the body dies, thus the higher state when it reenters this world upon reincarnation.

What we think is exercise is actually Asana, the third limb of yoga that is supposed to purify the body to be a proper vessel for the soul, to help the yogi gain mastery over the body for the sake of deep, sustained inhales and exhales, which we now know are prayers to the self as God. Here in the West, because we think Asana is exercise we skip over the first two limbs, which promote indifference toward the world and others. Indifference would certainly help quiet the mind loaded with worries and cares, but it should set off serious alarms in any properly formed Catholic. Isn't Christ's great commandment to love one another? Also, the deep breathing of Asana poses allows the yogi to achieve such a deeply relaxed physical state. Recall that the purpose of yoga is to escape pain and sorrow. I believe that the intense relaxation is the primary reason why so many people find themselves seeking out a more disciplined yoga practice, as I did. The racing mind disturbs relaxation, and if determined, the yogi will break his or her mind,  move on through the remaining limbs, deepen the rift between the body and soul, and turn the mind in on itself. From: Why Catholics Should Never Do Yoga

Yoga is incompatible with Catholicism because the best known practice of Hindu spirituality is Yoga. “Inner” Hinduism professes pantheism, which denies that there is only one infinite Being who created the world out of nothing. This pantheistic Hinduism says to the multitude of uncultured believers who follow the ways of the gods that they will receive the reward of the gods. They will have brief tastes of heaven between successive rebirths on earth. But they will never be delivered from the “wheel of existence” with its illusory lives and deaths until they realize that only “God” exists and all else is illusion (Maya). To achieve this liberation the principal way is by means of concentration and self control (yoga).

Indian spirituality is perhaps best known by the practice of yoga, derived from the root yuj to unite or yoke, which in context means union with the Absolute. Numerous stages are distinguished in the upward progress toward the supreme end of identification: by means of knowledge with the deity; the practice of moral virtues and observance of ethical rules; bodily postures; control of internal and external senses; concentration of memory and meditation–finally terminating in total absorption (samadhi), “when the seer stands in his own nature.” From: Why is Yoga incompatible with Catholicism? FATHER JOHN HARDON, S.J.

"27. Eastern Christian meditation 32 has valued "psychophysical symbolism," often absent in western forms of prayer. It can range from a specific bodily posture to the basic life functions, such as breathing or the beating of the heart. The exercise of the "Jesus Prayer," for example, which adapts itself to the natural rhythm of breathing can, at least for a certain time, be of real help to many people. 33 On the other hand, the eastern masters themselves have also noted that not everyone is equally suited to making use of this symbolism, since not everybody is able to pass from the material sign to the spiritual reality that is being sought. Understood in an inadequate and incorrect way, the symbolism can even become an idol and thus an obstacle to the raising up of the spirit to God. To live out in one's prayer the full awareness of one's body as a symbol is even more difficult: it can degenerate into a cult of the body and can lead surreptitiously to considering all bodily sensations as spiritual experiences.


28. Some physical exercises automatically produce a feeling of quiet and relaxation, pleasing sensations, perhaps even phenomena of light and of warmth, which resemble spiritual well-being. To take such feelings for the authentic consolations of the Holy Spirit would be a totally erroneous way of conceiving the spiritual life. Giving them a symbolic significance typical of the mystical experience, when the moral condition of the person concerned does not correspond to such an experience, would represent a kind of mental schizophrenia which could also lead to psychic disturbance and, at times, to moral deviations." From: LETTER TO THE BISHOPS OF THE CATHOLIC CHURCH ON SOME ASPECTS OF CHRISTIAN MEDITATION Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith