Gratitude

With the recent holiday season and advent of a fresh new year, I am reminded of the importance of gratitude as a vital part of my character.

This goes further than simply saying that I ought to be "thankful" for everything in life.  Instead, I am interested in the virtue of gratitude and what it entails. In particular, how it follows from humility and how it is a precursor for forgiveness.

Gratitude is a vital virtue. It is fundamental to holiness.  Rev. Ronald Rolhesier, OMI expresses that "at the age 75 you need to only have one word left in your spiritual vocabulary, gratitude, and that maturity is attained precisely at that moment when gratitude begins to drown out and cauterize the hurts in your life...Just as smoke follows fire, forgiveness follows gratitude. Gratitude ultimately undergirds and fuels all genuine virtue, is the real basis of holiness, and the source of love itself."  - Taken from June 3, 2011 issue of the Tidings 

While I agree with the Reverend, I would like to add that humility alone precedes even this virtue and allows for the development of gratitude.

One example that I think illustrates this clearly is "pickiness".  When I go over to somebody's house and refuse to eat what they have prepared for me, or pick around everything, it is because not only am I not truly thankful for the hospitality, but I lack a certain humility. It is pride that says, "I refuse to eat this." Pickiness that comes simply from the will, I believe is prideful.   

Another example of pride is not thanking a gift-giver, host, the person who opens the door for me at the mall, etc... While the latter is obviously a tiny sign of ingratitude, or unthoughtful behavior, I think that even this minute lack of action stems from pride: "that person is not worth the time it will take me to give an expression of gratitude to."

We are all called to a twofold charity: love of God and love of neighbor. What is love of neighbor? At its most basic, I think it is acknowledging the existence of the people around us in a positive way.  If this is so, and if not acknowledging a person when I encounter him is a sin against charity, then failing to be grateful to someone who has extended himself for me is a sin against gratitude. I heard a priest once say in a homily that the one sin that is rarely confessed is the sin of omission, that is, for all the good things failed, forgot or deliberately avoided.

The reason that the virtue of gratitude is acquired by being humble is because in humility, I realize that I am not owed anything (click here). Gratitude is anti-cultural as it goes against the highly individualistic attitude of "my life is all about me" and "these are all my rights".  Once this attitude is dropped, I am more able to accept everything as a grace, a gift, as opposed to "what is owed to me". 

With true humility, gratitude no longer is forced: "ok, let me stop and count my blessings";  instead it is lived. Counting the blessing occurs as the blessing happens. This awareness that everything is a gift, provides more joy in my soul and provides true peace.

Forgiveness follows from this because the awareness that I am really nothing, enables me to see that I am not better than my neighbor. "Yes, his offense against me was hurtful, but I am not better than him. I have hurt others also." If, I wish for the gift of forgiveness for my errors, I realize I must also give it.  The more humble I am, the more grateful I become, and it becomes easier and easier to forgive.

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Gratitude is the sign of noble souls.
— Aesop (620-550 BC), Androcles

Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all the others.
— Marcus Tullius Cicero (106 BC-43 BC), Pro Plancio (54 BC)  

If I only have the will to be grateful, I am so.
— Seneca (8 BC-65 AD) 

No duty is more urgent than that of returning thanks.
— Saint Ambrose (340-397 AD), De Spiritu Sancto

And as it is the most generous souls who have most gratitude, it is those who have most pride, and who are most base and infirm, who most allow themselves to be carried away by anger and hatred.
— René Descartes (1596-1650), Passions of the Soul (1649), CCI  

Thanksgiving is good but thanks-living is better.
— Matthew Henry (1662-1714)  

He enjoys much who is thankful for little; a grateful mind is both a great and a happy mind.
— Thomas Secker (1693-1768), Archbishop of Cantebury  

Gratitude is a fruit of great cultivation; you do not find it among gross people.
— Samuel Johnson (1709-1784),
     Boswell's Tour to the Hebrides (1785) [Sept. 20, 1773]  

If gratitude is due from children to their earthly parent, how much more is the gratitude of the great family of men due to our father in heaven.
— Hosea Ballou (1771-1852)  

Courtesies of a small and trivial character are the ones which strike deepest in the grateful and appreciating heart.
— Henry Clay (1777-1852) 

Postal officials say that before Christmas they receive tons of letters written to Santa Claus, but after Christmas how few letters of thanks are sent to him! From childhood onward, human beings seem to be characterized by thanklessness.
— Robert E. Lee (1807-1870)   

Pride slays thanksgiving, but a humble mind is the soul out of which thanks naturally grows, A proud man is seldom a grateful man, for he never thinks he gets as much as he gives.
— Henry Ward Beecher (1813-1887)  

Life without thankfulness is devoid of love and passion. Hope without thankfulness is lacking in fine perception. Faith without thankfulness lacks strength and fortitude. Every virtue divorced from thankfulness is maimed and limps along the spiritual road.
— John Henry Jowett (1864-1923)  

A true Christian is a man who never for a moment forgets what God has done for him in Christ and whose whole comportment and whose activity have their root in the sentiment of gratitude.
— Jacques Maritain (1886-1960), A Diary of Private Prayer (1936)  

The hardest arithmetic to master is that which enables us to count our blessings.
— Eric Hoffer (1902-1983), Reflections On The Human Condition (1973)  

One can never pay in gratitude; one can only pay "in kind" somewhere else in life.
— Anne Morrow Lindbergh (1906-2001), Listen! the Wind (1938), Ch. 19  

The best way to show my gratitude to God is to accept everything, even my problems, with joy.
— Mother Teresa (1910-1997)  

God gave you a gift of 86,400 seconds today. Have you used one to say "thank you?"
— William A. Ward (1921-1994)  

http://www.wisdomportal.com/Gratitude/Gratitude-Quotes.html

New Year's Resolution

I have many resolutions, many goals and aspirations for myself.  However, I often find that I get exited about the "new" thing that I am doing and will slowly let the project die as the excitement wanes. This is usually because I was too ambitious in the beginning.

Having embraced a more "live in each moment" attitude, not depending so much on the future perfect me, I have decided that I am not going to make a new year's resolution. Instead, I am going to make a today resolution. What am I going to do today that will making me healthier, holier and more loving to those around me? I am going to renew this question everyday.  I want kindness, generosity, and loving sacrifice to be my normal way of being.  However, thinking about it and writing about virtues, will not change my rough edges or transform all my selfishness. Transformation occurs almost invisibly through daily effort. 

My life plan is to do the Will of God and to become holy. However, the Will of God isn't always clear and holiness is difficult. While this is the point of my life, holiness is vague, overwhelming and prompts many questions. It needs to be broken down. I think three categories suffice.

1) Mental and bodily health
2) Prayer
3) Love of neighbor

The first, is health. My body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. It is necessary that I take care of it for Him. He needs a pure, clean place to dwell in not a filthy or unstable place.  If I am not healthy and if I don't take care of myself, I am wasting graces and can not adequately serve God and my neighbor. How can I love my neighbor as myself, if I don't love myself?

The second is prayer.  It is impossible to love God if I do not know Him. Prayer is the key to establishing a relationship with Him. Like all relationships, the relationship I have with God is not static, it is always developing or if I "ignore" Him the relationship is weakened.

The third is love of neighbor. If I claim to love God but have no love of neighbor, I am a hypocrite. These two loves go together.

With these three categories in mind, I am going to chose an activity daily that will increase at least one of them. The activities are going to be simple and manageable. Maybe one day, I'll forgo a soda and drink water instead. Maybe I will spend ten extra minutes in prayer. Maybe, I will take out the trash when it is not my turn. Regardless of what the activity is, I am going to make sure that I go out of my way today to improve. I have to be the best me today -- whatever that entails, because maybe today is all that I have.

The Amazing and Miraculous Image of Guadalupe

        My aunt sent me this video for the feast day of Our Lady of Guadalupe. However, I only just watched it recently.  Although it is Christmas Eve, and about two weeks late, it is never a wrong time to honor the Blessed Virgin-- who with her yes, also became our mother.

       In this beautiful seasons of miracles, I hope you enjoy this video.

More information: http://www.marian.org/shrine/story.php?NID=3439

Perfect Joy - According to St. Francis

Yesterday was Gaudette Sunday and I was looking for some profound meditation on joy. Instead, I found this wonderful story of Saint Francis.

From: http://feastofsaints.com/perfectjoy.htm

How St. Francis Taught Brother Leo That Perfect Joy Is Only in the Cross

to left: Giotto's Saint Francis

One winter day St. Francis was coming to St. Mary of the Angels from Perugia with Brother Leo, and the bitter cold made them suffer keenly. St. Francis called to Brother Leo, who was walking a bit ahead of him, and he said: "Brother Leo, even if the Friars Minor in every country give a great example of holiness and integrity and good edification, nevertheless write down and note carefully that perfect joy is not in that."

 And when he had walked on a bit, St. Francis called him again, saying: "Brother Leo, even if a Friar Minor gives sight to the blind, heals the paralyzed, drives out devils, gives hearing back to the deaf, makes the lame walk, and restores speech to the dumb, and what is still more, brings back to life a man who has been dead four days, write that perfect joy is not in that."

And going on a bit, St. Francis cried out again in a strong voice: "Brother Leo, if a Friar Minor knew all languages and all sciences and Scripture, if he also knew bow to prophesy and to reveal not only the future but also the secrets of the consciences and minds of others, write down and note carefully that perfect joy is not in that."

And as they walked on, after a while St. Francis called again forcefully: 'Brother Leo, Little Lamb of God, even if a Friar minor could speak with the voice of an angel, and knew the courses of the stars and the powers of herbs, and knew all about the treasures in the earth, and if be knew the qualities of birds and fishes, animals, humans, roots, trees, rocks, and waters, write down and note carefully that true joy is not in that."

And going on a bit farther, St. Francis called again strongly: "Brother Leo, even if a Friar Minor could preach so well that be should convert all infidels to the faith of Christ, write that perfect joy is not there."

Now when he had been talking this way for a distance of two miles, Brother Leo in great amazement asked him: "Father, I beg you in God's name to tell me where perfect joy is."

And St. Francis replied; "When we come to St. Mary of the Angels, soaked by the rain and frozen by the cold, all soiled with mud and suffering from hunger, and we ring at the gate of the Place and the brother porter comes and says angrily: 'Who are you?' And we say: 'We are two of your brothers.' And he contradicts us, saying: 'You are not telling the truth. Rather you are two rascals who go around deceiving people and stealing what they give to the poor. Go away]' And he does not open for us, but makes us stand outside in the snow and rain, cold and hungry, until night falls-then if we endure all those insults and cruel rebuffs patiently, without being troubled and without complaining, and if we reflect humbly and charitably that that porter really knows us and that God makes him speak against us, oh, Brother Leo, write that perfect joy is there!

'And if we continue to knock, and the porter comes out in anger, and drives us away with curses and hard blows like bothersome scoundrels, saying; 'Get away from here, you dirty thieves-go to the hospital! Who do you think you are? You certainly won't eat or sleep here'--and if we bear it patiently and take the insults with joy and love in our hearts, Oh, Brother Leo, write that that is perfect joy!

And if later, suffering intensely from hunger and the painful cold, with night falling, we still knock and call, and crying loudly beg them to open for us and let us come in for the love of God, and he grows still more angry and says: 'Those fellows are bold and shameless ruffians. I'll give them what they deserve.'  And he comes out with a knotty club, and grasping us by the cowl throws us onto the ground, rolling us in the mud and snow, and beats us with that club so much that he covers our bodies with wounds--if we endure all those evils and insults and blows with joy and patience, reflecting that we must accept and bear the sufferings of the Blessed Christ patiently for love of Him, oh, Brother Leo, write: that is perfect joy!

'And now hear the conclusion, Brother Leo. Above all the graces and gifts of the Holy Spirit which Christ gives to His friends is that of conquering oneself and willingly enduring sufferings, insults, humiliations, and hardships for the love of Christ. For we cannot glory in all those other marvelous gifts of God, as they are not ours but God's, as the Apostle says: 'What have you that you have not received?' But we can glory in the cross of tribulations and afflictions, because that is ours, and so the Apostle says: 'I will not glory save in the Cross of Our Lord Jesus Christ.'"

To whom be honor and glory forever and ever. Amen.

from The Little Flowers of St Francis, The "Fioretti"